One of the best quotes I have seen…. something I tell clients daily is this! You won’t move on until you are ready! You won’t stop using or drinking until you are ready. You will live in the pain and try to mask it for as long as Society keeps pushing you to ignore it…. or… you can live in the pain…. embrace it…. till you are done with it… be hurt… be mad… get angry! Just never get stuck there!
Sometimes…. we ALL get stuck!
Sometimes…. we ALL need someone to pull us back into the Light!
Thank God, for those people!
But… never STAY… Living in the pain…..
Never… get lost to the pain!
Feel it for as long as you need to….
Then…. Remember….. Release it! Never hold on to it too tightly! It wasn’t meant to stay and linger…. That is where Hope and Love belong!
I have noticed that throughout life. The things we are allowed to have seem to not appeal to us. They are no longer shiny and new?
As soon as something or someone denies us…. we now become determined to master this thing! Or we find ourselves compelled to win its affections. I have done it myself, I see my clients do it daily!!! I have seen my friends and family do it. No one is without falling into this trap!
So why is that? Why are our brains wired this way? Why do we chase after the very things that reject us? That tear down our self worth? That do not validate the very essence of who we are?
We are born worthy! We are innately loved and worthy of recieving love in return…. each and everyone of us. Not one person truly stands out greater than another…. we are all truly on equal footing once you remove the flesh!
So why?
What compels us to seek out what rejected us?
Isn’t that THE Question?!! To most of lifes problems?
I have a theory….
That most of us….
Do not know what happiness truly looks like!
We have no real idea how to BE happy with ourselves, much less accepting of someone else’s acceptance of us.
So we run scared when we meet the very thing we so desperately crave! We never thought it truly existed. We are often in shock if we find it. Sometimes we do not even recognize it if we do.
We see it and we do not know what to do with it! So we turn and we run!
We hope it will fade or go away or work itself out. We put up walls and barriers to protect ourselves. We suddenly feel vulnerable….
This is a new, odd sensation for many!
We don’t trust it. So we run! We run from it because it must not be real. It. was too easy. We have been taught in life, things must be hard!
We go through our entire lives trying to make sense of the unknown…. trying to force connections. When we meet the real thing…
We freeze! We react poorly and we simply fail to believe in ourselves enough to believe we deserve such a gift in life!
So we settle… so often we settle for less then Everything we deserve!
This week has been a struggle to be honest…. physically! Mentally…. There is a shift in the air around me..and I can sense it, down to my very core!
My energy levels have been off! I don’t like this feeling…. of being tired and drained…. my mind… has a thousand things, going on at once…. This week… my body can’t seem to keep up!
It’s an odd sensation… feeling your body turn against you. Knowing there is a mass growing inside you… Trying to re-focus on life and other more vital things..
Life surely has such an odd timing….
Sometimes, I have to sit back and laugh.. I think.. I must have lived some crazy life in the past. To have warranted me this one. This particular journey. SURELY I am suppose to be learning some important life lessons that I must be forgetting!
We do not get the fairytales!
But then again… who wants that? How dull and mundane would that world be? I prefer life’s woes and Joy’s. Its hills and valleys… I want the storms and rains… along with the blue skies and sunny days…. I thrive on the diversity and mixture of emotions!
I want it all!
That has always been my problem….
I never want to give up….. anything!
So scared of being trapped… Trapped by my choices! That I always keep my options open…..
Sometimes the easiest way to see the change… is to strip away all the chaos. Sit alone in the dark, and listen to your inner voice! See the world with fresh eyes and perspective. Sometime, the easiest way to see the world… is in Black and White!
I can sit comfortably alone with my truths, my paths, my journeys and myself…. I know who I am and where I have been in this world. I know myself… I am evolving, ever learning and ever changing…. But I am always honest about where I am in life and what path and journey I am on!
I can own my TRUTHS…. Even when I do not like them…. For they simply are facts…. Stepping stones for me to build upon!
As the rain pours down tonight… Can you…? Reach within yourself…. And truly own…. The path you are on?
When all the thoughts inside my head come to a stop. When I finally empty out the cup. When I try so hard to escape from life’s realities…. I find myself, yet again…. Alone with my thoughts!
jenzphelps 